Sometimes I am glad I’m disorganized. I know that sounds weird, but the people I know who plan every little thing seem unhappy somehow. There will always be a part of me that enjoys living life spontaneously. I get a feeling about something or someone and I go towards that feeling. This can be a great thing or my impulsive nature can get me into sticky situations. I’m trying to find a balance between these two aspects of my personality.
Planning is inevitably a part of life. People plan trips, they plan for their kid’s college fund and before that even happens they plan for marriage. That’s the thing though, how do you plan for a relationship? Do you anticipate what problems may arise in a relationship in the future? It doesn’t seem possible to plan for each and every scenario because life is full of surprises. For example, you can’t predict if your partner will be unfaithful. Sometimes that situation comes out of the blue.
I think that planning is a good thing, but bear in mind that things can go in a different direction as much as you plan. It’s like that expression about making plans and God laughing. That’s pretty much the way life goes. That’s part of the reason I don’t like to plan each and every thing that goes on, because it increases my anxiety. When you have more flexibility and are able to go with the flow, life seems to go more smoothly. I find that when I get rigid with the way things “should” go, I get upset when things don’t go according to what I planned.
So, that’s why I make a conscious effort to be spontaneous. First of all being that way is more fun, and then when something doesn’t work out the way I thought it would, it isn’t a loss because I can just try something else. Life is way less disappointing when you are able to consider different options. It’s also way more exciting to be open to new things rather than being stubborn about the way things should go.
The one area that I have trouble with this is making plans with friends. If I have it in my head that I’m doing something with a friend and that plan gets cancelled, I have to readjust my expectations for the day. I understand that things happen and sometimes people have to cancel. In fact, I sometimes don’t feel like hanging out with people. Whether that’s because of my social anxiety or something happens and I need to cancel. But, generally I try to stick to the plan if I can.
I don’t like missing out on things. I want to enjoy my life and be involved in as many fun projects as I can. And sometimes fun things come up at the last minute and they’re unplanned! That’s fun too! Either way, as long as I am following my intuition, I am happy.
So, what about you? Are you a planner or do you do things on the fly?